Posted by: angiefm | January 2, 2010

On Resolve and Support

The Ng Family on Christmas morning – In order of age 🙂 … Tee Chiou, Angie, Alethea, Timothy, Nathalie, Daniel.  Taken by photography buff Bjorn Goh.

This is a quick post on some thoughts which have been on my mind the past couple of weeks. My sister-in-law who is expecting her first baby was asking about nursing and telling me that she had heard various horror stories about pain and difficulty and mothers who quit before the first month is out because it was just too difficult.

I told her I had two words of advice – RESOLVE and SUPPORT

And the more I thought about it, the more it seemed to apply to much of life.

RESOLVE – What am I resolved to do this year? 

  • Continue  to homeschool,
  • do without a domestic help from mid-March,
  • become more self-sufficient (cleaning, cooking, baking, sewing) and teach my children to be likewise and 
  • learn to live with less (much smaller apartment, way fewer things).

When we first talked about going maid-less, everyone said we were crazy to contemplate it.  After all, they said, the kids were still young, we had a baby, I’ve never done housework in my life (sad but true), I needed time to homeschool and not be distracted by chores and cooking, etc.

When we bought our new 109 sq metre apartment, everyone thought we were crazy to want to live in such a small space.  After all, they said, we had FOUR kids (actually when we bought it, we had 3 and didn’t know #4 was going to join us :)) and all the stuff that goes with that.  Hey when I saw the actual apartment 2 weeks ago when it was completed, even *I* was shocked at how small it was!  But the more we think about it, the more we know that this is really what we want to do.

But it is no different from when we first started homeschooling 5 years ago.  Everyone around us was so negative about it.  And so negative about my quitting a supposedly well-paying job to do it.  Yet we were resoloved.  And we did it.  And we have never regretted our decision. 

I don’t know how it is going to turn out when our helper leaves for home (she is coming back to work for a relative, if you’re wondering if you might employ her and yes, she is wonderful!), and I don’t know how it is going to work out when we move into our small apartment.  But I do know that Tee Chiou and I are together in this.  And we are RESOLVED.

SUPPORT – Where will I go and who will I consult with to get the support I need?  It is amazing how many naysayers there are out there.  For every person who has been supportive of our desire to do things differently this year, there must be at least 20 or 30 (maybe more) people who have told us we will not be successful. 

So like when we were starting to homeschool, I have been looking for support.  And support comes in many forms.  I read blogs on the simple life.  I buy books on easy cooking, on simple living.  I talk to families who have gone maidless or who have never had help in the first place (many are friends from overseas).  I surround myself with people who tell me I CAN!  And I minimise discussions on these topics with people who only want to convince me I can’t. 

HOW ABOUT YOU?  What are you resolved to do this year?  If you want to homeschool, if you want to quit your job, seek the Lord’s confirmation and your spouse’s agreement then be resolved to do it.  Seek out like-minded people to meet with, talk to, get advice from.  And surround yourself with support.

YOU CAN DO IT!  🙂  Here’s to 2010.  May it be a year full of the Lord’s blessings!

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Responses

  1. Angie, Jia you. I am SURE that you can DO IT !

  2. Hey Angie. The 109sqm apartment was a SMART move because it completely minimises the amount of housework you have to do and the size of the mess that can possibly be created 🙂 Happy New Year!!

  3. I know you can do it!!! any good sites for easy recipes? I’m starting to prepare lunch this year. Scary thought but I’m resolved to get it done 😛

  4. 🙂 love the picture! 🙂 And I support your resolutions!!!! 🙂

  5. Am sure you can do it if you are resolved to do so. It’s really a personal choice and whether you think the decision will benefit your family as a whole.

    We are also the minority (a family of 7) without help from extended family and domestic worker. Often we do get ridiculed by friends for being gungho, but we persevere because we see how independent and self motivated the children turn out.

    When the going gets tough, I always turn to fellow mothers in similar situation for strength and encouragement.

    So enjoy that pending independence and privacy. You will love it.

  6. Love your family photo, you are so blessed! :)….I am sure that you can do it whatever you put your mind on. And do remember, we are supposed to store our treasure up in heaven and not here on earth. So going into a small apartment will bring this into mind! :)…I am also trying to remind myself – simplify, simplify, simplify! So keep up the good work!

  7. If there is anyone who can do it, it is you! And I am sure that you will succeed. We can do all things in Him who strengthens us. Will be praying for the period of adjustment to be as painless as possible and after that its just cruising 🙂

    The kids are going to turn out really independant and its really the best thing that you can do for them.

    I’m going to plan to go maidless too. Will pray for timeline. Now is really not the time unless I’m going to clean the toilet with one hand and carry small one with the other! 🙂

  8. Hi Angie, I just want to say that I love coming to your blog. I love the detailed info that you write on homeschooling. Sophie is 3 and will turn 4 this year and we’re now missionaries in NZ. So I’ll be attempting to h/s from this year onwards and reading your blog keeps me going! We live a simply life too and i’m picking up baking and cooking since we got here and it’s GREAT! I think it’ll be a great year for you. You can do it!

  9. hi dear
    great pic. say hi to tc and the kids.
    i’m more than surviving, the kids are fed, the house is relatively clean so fears were groundless 🙂 you can do it !
    barb

  10. Go for it Angie !

  11. We may have an opportunity to move to Singapore…we have 6 kids and homeschool…so we were looking up laws for that. Found you blog that way.

    Wanted to let you know that sometimes it’s hard to go against the stream but just do what feels right to you and avoid the naysayers.

  12. hi-angie,great-photo.you-can-do-it.i-also-have-any-negative-opinions-about-quitting-from-teaching-and-homeschooling.Even-pastors-question-me-and-they-felt-me-being-too-protective.i-just-answer-its-divine-assignment-from-God.

  13. hi-angie,great-photo.you-can-do-it.i-also-have-many-negative-opinions-about-quitting-from-teaching-and-starting-homeschooling.Even-pastors-question-me-and-they-felt-me-being-too-protective.i-just-answer-its-divine-assignment-from-God.


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